Tuesday

(9.06 am)

Chip: Hey! Let’s go to France for the long weekend!

[good morning to you too]

(11.47 am)

The Meteor: Hey! I’ve been lying on a beach for 10 days and I’ve got a pure choco tan.

[and I’m here working 12-hour days for the next campaign. I’ll kill him.]

(12.10 pm)

Anna Chronismus: Hey! I’m flying to London for the weekend. Let’s go see Benedict Cumberbatch play Hamlet on Saturday and yarn shopping on Sunday!

[fair enough, this was pre-arranged. Yarn shopping was added as a bonus.]

(04.38 pm)

Chip: Hey! I booked the tickets for France! You want to find a hotel? I’ll drive us from London to Lille.

[he’s organized and determined, let’s give him that]

(07:17 pm)

Sir P: Hey! Let’s throw Seirios a party for his 30^th. I’ll come to London from Athens for 8 hours on the day. Also, remember that book you wanted? I’ll deliver it to you personally on some other random date because Athens-London is like King’s Cross-Bank in my mind.

[this one is a whole chapter all on his own. I can’t even.]

(07.45 pm)

Seirios’ girlfriend: Hey! Birthday party for Seirios sounds like a great idea! I’m making him run a marathon so I need something good!

[yay!]

(08.21 pm)

Anna Banana: Hey! I quit my job. I’m celebrating with wine and Zombieland. Can you help forward my CV?

[what? Sure, yes, are you OK?]

(08.32 pm)

Mum: Hey! I’m making fig jam!

Dad: Hey! I’m monitoring the tortoise’s eggs – when they hatch, I’ll film it!

[wonderful. Save me some jam, I’ll pass on the eggs.]

My biggest achievement to date: I’ve somehow managed to surround myself with all those adorable lunatics.